So, i was asked my opinion on situation on the Gorilla and the little boy....the gorilla was shot to protect a child...did i blame the mother? The Zoo? What did i think about the whole thing.
Well, okay, i'll tell you what i think.
Nothing.
I don't think anyone was to blame.
It happened. It's sad, it's tragic....The gorilla was beautiful, the child adorable.
Do i blame the zoo? Oh my gosh, don't i feel they should've tried something else, tranqs, shock, anything...how dare they murder that gorilla? No. I don't. The zoo keepers knew that gorilla, they knew what it was capable of and no way no how do i believe they thought "oh, what the heck, let's just kill it, no big deal." That must have been a horrible moment for them....they had loved and cared for this beautiful animal for a long time, and i'm sure they tried to weight their options and took what they thought was the only option.
Do i blame the mother - the woman who allowed her child to get through the cage, fall 15 feel and to save him, they had to shoot the gorilla? Isn't she at fault, a horrible neglectful mother? Okay, confession time....i've lost my children in stores. I've turned around and the stinkers were gone. The only reason we had our first dog is because while i was filling out paperwork at the pound, i made the mistake of believing my child was asleep in his stroller. Nate unbuckled himself from the stroller, got out, went down a hall, i became aware he was gone when i heard huge dogs going nuts...my son was walking past the cages looking for his dream dog. Oh, and Ben ran off at the beach...and Talina was playing outside one day and i couldn't find her and was screaming for her. (okay, she had gone back in her room through the back door). Thinking if i ever lost jenn....can't think of one, but hey, i am a bad mother, so i am sure i did.
It's really bothering me how much mothers feel the need to bash other mothers. A couple went to dinner together when their newborn was 9 days old....oh my the horrors! Sadly, they didn't bash the husband, they attacked the woman, but not the father....kudos to him for standing up and saying "if you are going to bash her, you better bash me too."
A woman lost all her baby fat, and she was immediately bashed and attacked as being a horrible role model...fyi, with ben, i never outgrew my clothes, i wore my regular clothes to the hospital and wore them back home again. Bad me, i know.
Come on....stop.
Give the zoo credit for putting that baby first and doing what they felt needed to be done. People who were with that gorilla every day and knew what it was capable of.
Feel with the mom, the pain, the horror, the hell she went through when she saw gorilla grab her son and drag him through the water....and the guilt she feels even now, knowing her baby was almost killed. And the hell she is dealing with now, being crucified by parents around the world who believe they would NEVER EVER have allowed that to happen.
We all believe we would never ever do what they did. Because...well, we're like, so totally so much better.
I pray i never go through what the zoo keepers and parents went through. I pray you never go through it either.
But if you do. I'll be here for you.
I love you.
Tuesday, May 31, 2016
Friday, May 27, 2016
40 Days of Purpose, 13 years later.
So, a few days ago, a mother was on facebook, bragging upside down sideways and backwards about the amazing accomplishment her child had done.
I've been on facebook, bragging, as have most of my friends.
That's our job. We do that. We are proud of them, we live vicariously through our kids and we are stinking proud when they do above and beyond what we did.
So a few days ago, a parent came up to me and complimented me on Ben's work for Autism Awareness. She had read the article in the paper, and wow, what a great kid. I thanked her. She then said something that had me stepping back....her comment was that my kid had far to go, and her son couldn't get his face out of the computer fast long enough to clean his room, let alone change the world. At the rate he's going, she said, he is taking the fast track to being a bum.
What was worse is that her son was standing right next to her. He looked upset, and lowered his head.
"Huh." I said, in my sugar sweet tone that warns my kids they better run. "They said the same stuff about Albert Einstein. That he wasn't going to amount to anything. And he's the most famous mathematician in the world." I then smiled at the kid who was now looking at me. "I guess you got a great future, can't wait to see what you do to light this world on fire."
Then looking at the now very annoyed mother, i said "God don't make no junk. Have a great day."
I don't think I'll be on her Christmas card list this year.
Yesterday, i had to run to OCHS, and saw the kid. I have no clue what his name is, but from across the parking lot, i got "Hi Mrs. Corner! Have a great day!"
I will never understand why a parent feels it is okay to put down their kid, not only in private, but it's worse when it's in front of others. Our kids get emotionally beaten up all the time. From classmates, teachers, "friends" who aren't really friends, strangers, tv, magazines.
They are never good enough, they are never thin enough, they are never smart enough, they didn't do everything right, there's always someone better that they compare themselves to.
That incident served as a very strong reminder to me of what I believe God wants from me. Years ago, I did the 40 days of purpose. Over and over again, i knew God wanted me to fight the good fight for kids. To help them feel good about themselves, give them a sense of pride in their accomplishments.
At that time, i was the director of Higher Power and i loved watching kids grin like crazy when they did something and were proud and their team mates were cheering them on.
I have to admit, i have't thought that much about it in the past year or two. I pray i never put a child down, but it wasn't a priority to lift them up.
But that woman reminded me, He didn't tell me to stop. He needs me and everyone, to make our kids feel valuable, to let them know that life ain't all bad, and there's someone in their corner.
And it isn't all that hard.
When you go to a concert, and you see a mother drop her kid off at his last band concert of the year and hear her yell "Call me when its over." It really easy to go up to him when the concert is over and he's waiting for his ride, to go up to him and say "Knock out job, you looked like you were having fun up there. See ya in marching band."
When you see a kid alone, everyone else is standing around and ignoring them, to go up and say "Oh my gosh, is your hair naturally that curly? I am so jealous. I'm *******, what's your name?"
When you know a kid is having a rough time, say something nice on facebook about a picture they posted, or a comment or a selfie...something.
That mother served as a reminder that HE needs us to let His children know they aren't alone. That just because some one puts them down, there is someone around who is going to lift them up.
I remember feeling worthless, unloved, alone, picked up, bullied and emotionally destroyed. And i am going to do my best to prevent others from feeling that way.
Who's in with me?
I love you.
I've been on facebook, bragging, as have most of my friends.
That's our job. We do that. We are proud of them, we live vicariously through our kids and we are stinking proud when they do above and beyond what we did.
So a few days ago, a parent came up to me and complimented me on Ben's work for Autism Awareness. She had read the article in the paper, and wow, what a great kid. I thanked her. She then said something that had me stepping back....her comment was that my kid had far to go, and her son couldn't get his face out of the computer fast long enough to clean his room, let alone change the world. At the rate he's going, she said, he is taking the fast track to being a bum.
What was worse is that her son was standing right next to her. He looked upset, and lowered his head.
"Huh." I said, in my sugar sweet tone that warns my kids they better run. "They said the same stuff about Albert Einstein. That he wasn't going to amount to anything. And he's the most famous mathematician in the world." I then smiled at the kid who was now looking at me. "I guess you got a great future, can't wait to see what you do to light this world on fire."
Then looking at the now very annoyed mother, i said "God don't make no junk. Have a great day."
I don't think I'll be on her Christmas card list this year.
Yesterday, i had to run to OCHS, and saw the kid. I have no clue what his name is, but from across the parking lot, i got "Hi Mrs. Corner! Have a great day!"
I will never understand why a parent feels it is okay to put down their kid, not only in private, but it's worse when it's in front of others. Our kids get emotionally beaten up all the time. From classmates, teachers, "friends" who aren't really friends, strangers, tv, magazines.
They are never good enough, they are never thin enough, they are never smart enough, they didn't do everything right, there's always someone better that they compare themselves to.
That incident served as a very strong reminder to me of what I believe God wants from me. Years ago, I did the 40 days of purpose. Over and over again, i knew God wanted me to fight the good fight for kids. To help them feel good about themselves, give them a sense of pride in their accomplishments.
At that time, i was the director of Higher Power and i loved watching kids grin like crazy when they did something and were proud and their team mates were cheering them on.
I have to admit, i have't thought that much about it in the past year or two. I pray i never put a child down, but it wasn't a priority to lift them up.
But that woman reminded me, He didn't tell me to stop. He needs me and everyone, to make our kids feel valuable, to let them know that life ain't all bad, and there's someone in their corner.
And it isn't all that hard.
When you go to a concert, and you see a mother drop her kid off at his last band concert of the year and hear her yell "Call me when its over." It really easy to go up to him when the concert is over and he's waiting for his ride, to go up to him and say "Knock out job, you looked like you were having fun up there. See ya in marching band."
When you see a kid alone, everyone else is standing around and ignoring them, to go up and say "Oh my gosh, is your hair naturally that curly? I am so jealous. I'm *******, what's your name?"
When you know a kid is having a rough time, say something nice on facebook about a picture they posted, or a comment or a selfie...something.
That mother served as a reminder that HE needs us to let His children know they aren't alone. That just because some one puts them down, there is someone around who is going to lift them up.
I remember feeling worthless, unloved, alone, picked up, bullied and emotionally destroyed. And i am going to do my best to prevent others from feeling that way.
Who's in with me?
I love you.
Sunday, May 22, 2016
Lonliness
It's amazing how easy it is to be lonely, when surrounded by people.
Years ago, i lost both my parents. Both left too soon, only having met one of my four kids. While i didn't have a perfect relationship with them, the loss of grandparents for my kids is sometimes more than i can bear.
I have friends, i believe i have a good amount of friends, but....you ever have that feeling that you are all alone? You find out your friends are doing things without you and you go through that "No one really likes me" phase? When you're standing in a crowd, and everyone seems to be talking around you, but not with you? When you feel overwhelmed and feel like you have no one to call to help you out?
Yeah, me too.
No matter how popular you are, no matter how many friends you have, no matter how well you get along with your co-workers, you feel completely alone.
The past few weeks, i have felt completely alone. I feel lonely, deep down bone aching lonely. My family is in Holland, they are having their own issues. I have friends, but everyone seems to be battling their own issues. We left our church, and are searching for a new home, and i received emails telling me that i had been removed from their online neighborhood, emails and prayer requests.
Last night, i woke up in the middle of the night, exhausted beyond exhausted, but unable to sleep. I was overwhelmed with thoughts of being alone, no friends, no one cared about me. It was devastated. Tears soaked my pillow, i was just lost. Very cold, very alone.
Then, somewhere in the dark, i felt a hand on my shoulder. First, i thought it was my husband, but he was still snoring to the left of me, and the hand was on my right. Where i had been bone cold, i suddenly felt warmth. While no one said anything, i heard in my heart "You are not alone."
And that's when it occurred to me - Satan was having a field day with my emotions. Leaving a church, feeling like i had lost so many friends there....he knew i was low and sad. My friends were all doing different things, we are all too busy this time of year, and he was trying to get me to feel that no one wanted me as a friend. Satan was trying to make me feel small and alone.
But that warmth worked its way down to my toes. I took a deep cleansing breath. I then reached over for my phone, and opened the bible app, randomly opening a book.
Deuteronomy 31:8 The LORD is the one who is going ahead of you. He will be with you. He won’t abandon you or leave you. So don’t be afraid or terrified.”
My tears of depression and grief turned to joy. I got up, went outside in the pouring rain and just lifted my face to Him and thanked Him for loving me, wrapping me in His loving arms. I found myself laughing, as the rain drenched me. Laughing at satans attempt to drown me in sorrow. He knew my weakness, my fear of not having friends, something that has been with me since childhood. Fear of people not wanting me around, laughing behind my back, pushing me away. But God gave me HIS strength to fight against satan. He sent someone down, just to touch me, to make sure i knew i wasn't alone.
Recently, I was the person he sent out to touch a friend. A few weeks ago, He had me send out a text to a friend, just a reminder to my friend that I loved him. He texted me back, saying i had no idea how much he needed that right then and there. I texted him back, saying God knew, and that's why He had me text my friend. I got a call a few minutes later, and my friend told me the battle he had been fighting and his fears. I told him God was in control, and He told me to pray for him. A few days ago, my friend called me, happy, things were turning for the better.
We are never alone. God may send me to touch your shoulder, another friend to call or text you with a loving message. In the middle of the night, you may feel cold and alone....and you need to remember, you're not. He is there. When you are at your worst, He is at His best.
When you are so far down, i am here for you. I love you.
Years ago, i lost both my parents. Both left too soon, only having met one of my four kids. While i didn't have a perfect relationship with them, the loss of grandparents for my kids is sometimes more than i can bear.
I have friends, i believe i have a good amount of friends, but....you ever have that feeling that you are all alone? You find out your friends are doing things without you and you go through that "No one really likes me" phase? When you're standing in a crowd, and everyone seems to be talking around you, but not with you? When you feel overwhelmed and feel like you have no one to call to help you out?
Yeah, me too.
No matter how popular you are, no matter how many friends you have, no matter how well you get along with your co-workers, you feel completely alone.
The past few weeks, i have felt completely alone. I feel lonely, deep down bone aching lonely. My family is in Holland, they are having their own issues. I have friends, but everyone seems to be battling their own issues. We left our church, and are searching for a new home, and i received emails telling me that i had been removed from their online neighborhood, emails and prayer requests.
Last night, i woke up in the middle of the night, exhausted beyond exhausted, but unable to sleep. I was overwhelmed with thoughts of being alone, no friends, no one cared about me. It was devastated. Tears soaked my pillow, i was just lost. Very cold, very alone.
Then, somewhere in the dark, i felt a hand on my shoulder. First, i thought it was my husband, but he was still snoring to the left of me, and the hand was on my right. Where i had been bone cold, i suddenly felt warmth. While no one said anything, i heard in my heart "You are not alone."
And that's when it occurred to me - Satan was having a field day with my emotions. Leaving a church, feeling like i had lost so many friends there....he knew i was low and sad. My friends were all doing different things, we are all too busy this time of year, and he was trying to get me to feel that no one wanted me as a friend. Satan was trying to make me feel small and alone.
But that warmth worked its way down to my toes. I took a deep cleansing breath. I then reached over for my phone, and opened the bible app, randomly opening a book.
Deuteronomy 31:8 The LORD is the one who is going ahead of you. He will be with you. He won’t abandon you or leave you. So don’t be afraid or terrified.”
My tears of depression and grief turned to joy. I got up, went outside in the pouring rain and just lifted my face to Him and thanked Him for loving me, wrapping me in His loving arms. I found myself laughing, as the rain drenched me. Laughing at satans attempt to drown me in sorrow. He knew my weakness, my fear of not having friends, something that has been with me since childhood. Fear of people not wanting me around, laughing behind my back, pushing me away. But God gave me HIS strength to fight against satan. He sent someone down, just to touch me, to make sure i knew i wasn't alone.
Recently, I was the person he sent out to touch a friend. A few weeks ago, He had me send out a text to a friend, just a reminder to my friend that I loved him. He texted me back, saying i had no idea how much he needed that right then and there. I texted him back, saying God knew, and that's why He had me text my friend. I got a call a few minutes later, and my friend told me the battle he had been fighting and his fears. I told him God was in control, and He told me to pray for him. A few days ago, my friend called me, happy, things were turning for the better.
We are never alone. God may send me to touch your shoulder, another friend to call or text you with a loving message. In the middle of the night, you may feel cold and alone....and you need to remember, you're not. He is there. When you are at your worst, He is at His best.
When you are so far down, i am here for you. I love you.
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